Celtic Zodiac
October 28 – November 24 Sign: Reed (Ngetal)
The Fire Festival of Samhain
Symbol: The White Hound or the Stone
Ruling Planet: Pluto - Pwyll
Celtic Gods: Dis, Pwyll, Arwan
Reed signs among the Celtic tree astrology signs are the secret keepers. You dig deep inside to the real meaning of things and discover the truth hidden beneath layers of distraction. When there is a need to get to the heart of the matter, most certainly the Reed sign will find the core. You love a good story, and can be easily drawn in by gossip, scandals, legend and lore. These tendencies also make you an excellent historian, journalist, detective or archeologist. You love people because they represent a diversity of meanings for you to interpret. You are adept at coaxing people to talking to you, and sometimes you can be a bit manipulative. However, you have a strong sense of truth and honor so most of your scheming is harmless. Reed people join well with other Reeds, Ash or Oak signs.
Moon In Leo
Proud, benevolent, generous, creative and jolly. Craves to be noticed and appreciated, cannot bear to stay in the shadow or be criticized.
In the depths of their souls, these people know they are true nobility, perhaps even royalty or monarchs. They know for certain that they were born different to others and only some outrageous injustice has destined them to live in a small flat instead of a palace. Yet even in these circumstances the Moon in Leo tries hard to create a decent and elegant lifestyle. He or she insists on buying clothes and items which are special in some way, and enjoys throwing a party and having guests at home an easy way, perhaps, for them to show their true colours.
Leo Moons are proud of their children, who they naturally assume have remarkable talents that distinguish them from others, and as parents they are happy to spend whatever it takes to discover and develop their kids' talents. They can also be big spenders when it comes to buying clothes, both for themselves and their children. Wearing rags is not for nobles! Moon in Leo individuals often have good taste, especially with clothes and food, and this is frequently the result of their own parents' influence. Even if they don't have any creative talents of their own, which is highly unusual, they are still interested in arts, theatre and fashion, and they undoubtedly have their own distinct opinions about these, and all other subjects.
Playing, celebrating and partying are the best ways for Moon in Leo people to restore their energy after periods of stress. For good self-esteem, every now and again they also need to be viewed, appreciated, and adored.
If they don't have enough love in their life, Moon Leos can have problems with their heart, circulatory system or their general levels of physical energy. Problems with vision are also quite typical. Many Moon Leos tend to have some sort of difficulty in their relationships with their own children, perhaps because they are so eager to spoil them.
Moon in Leo Celebrities
Gordon Brown, Clint Eastwood, Jane Fonda, Mohandas Gandhi, Rudy Giuliani, Paul Hogan, Queen Elizabeth II, Julia Roberts, Carlos Santana, Paramahansa Yogananda.
Gamers: Know Your Rights
Monday, April 19, 2010
Saturday, March 27, 2010
The Use of Psychoactives in Ritual
"I am just reading my books on paganism/wicca and I came accross a chapter in Margot Adler's 'Drawing Down The Moon' called the ''Interview with a Modern Witch''. The woman interviewed is Sharon Devlin-member of the craft. She states that paganism today is lacking music, rhythm, dance and psychogenetic drugs. She also says that we have to bring those ecstatic states again by ritual drunkennes and sex, which was an essential to the rites in ancient times... The best part is that she blames Christianity'' for fear of ecstatic states, fear of intelligent use of hallucinogens, fear of intelligent and sensitive use of sexuality to produce extasy...'' I agree with the part about sexuality to certain degree. I am totaly against drugs and I am not a Christian. I go for rituals performed in the most pure, natural state. I don't have to be halucinating to reach my Goddess.
PLS Shere your opinions......"
First, let me say that the use of the word “drug” is wrong in this instance. Simply put crack is not the same as peyote. Never has been, never will be. To group them together is wrong and it implies that certain substances are bad by association. We would never tell someone in severe pain that they can’t have morphine simply because there are people out there without enough willpower to not use or get off of the medication and subsequently abuse it. So to group them together is just, to me, poorly informed or ill-educated.
There are some substances that can be used in ritual, and I choose to separate these substances under the title of Psycho-Active Substances. To me this implies that it is more for medicinal – and by this I mean medicine for the spirit – use. Psycho like psyche the “above mind” and active, just that. A stimulation of the higher self if you will.
I think that if you are comfortable using them (PAS) then by all means feel free. However, as the title implies I do not think that you should be slathering it on, or drinking it down every time you have circle. Also I think that there should be age limits, much like the one America uses for tobacco and alcohol. Again, willpower and intelligence are needed, and from what I have seen are used in regards to these substances.
Secondly, there is recorded evidence of real witches using PAS since the middle ages. The first known case we have of this comes from approximately 1450 in the form of Flying Ointment to be used in pagan rituals, specifically those of witches, and was made up of solanaceous herbs. In fact one such recipe indicates that you would use Henbane, Wolfsbane, Belladonna and Hemlock in a mixture boiled in animal fat – usually toads known for their hallucinogenic toxic production.
So to state that “Real Witches” would/have never used PAS shows a poor witch, or one who is just too lazy to actually do some research into their (and by this I mean witches as a whole) past. And yes, I do feel that if you state you are a witch, you are obligated to go out and look at your own history – that however is a personal stance, but so far it has helped me pick out the real from the fad.
Now on the point of sex in ritual, I do not understand how or why one who calls themselves a witch would be against it. As anyone I have ever known who has participated in a Beltane ritual has performed accordingly; whether as a solitary, or within a coven. This is one of the reasons most Beltane circles are closed to members who aren’t part of the coven and the vast majority separate the daytime celebrations from the evening, especially festivals occurring around this time – at least the ones I’ve been to and have heard of friends participating in.
So the fact that sex in ritual would now be something to worry about baffles me. This said I would have to go with my previous statement of “intelligence and willpower.” As for the age limit on sex – it’s a no brainer.
As for the issue of liking/agreeing with Drawing Down the Moon by Margot Adler, I’d have to say that I really did enjoy this book. For me it was a way of looking into the past and seeing the struggle for Paganism to be recognized in its many facets (Druid, Wiccan, Hindu, etc etc) as a valid religious/spiritual choice. You also have to remember that you DON’T have to agree with what was said or done. Whether you live in American land of the free, or any other democratic society, or even any modern society you have a right to believe as you see fit so long as it doesn’t hurt someone else. This means everyone has the RIGHT to their own opinion.
That is what is so great about our time NOW. What Adler, Budapest, Starhawk, Crowley, Gardner, Buckland, Valiente worked their asses off for – our right to pick and choose what we want to learn. This is WHY we have so many different authors out there. I don’t know about you, but every book I have in my collection tells you point blank: “I am not saying that you HAVE to do it like this, choose what WORKS FOR YOU.” For instance, my friend loves Silver Ravenwolf – to me she is a preachy mom and gets on my nerves. Do I like everything she says? Hell No! Some of her points are valid; some of them are batshit crazy to me. I still read all her books though, regardless of how I feel about what she has to say on certain issues.
And personally – I don’t really like the tone of “if you use drugs or have sex you’re a bad person because my mommy told me so.” I think that attitude is part of the PROBLEM we have today. I think that if you are not comfortable doing it – you should not do it, but if you are myself and no one else has the right to tell you “you are wrong” just because we don’t agree. In my opinion that is a very Christian (Christian not the same as Christ Follower) attitude, and I just don’t like it.
If you don’t agree, disagree, but do not lord your opinion all over everywhere with a Holier-Than-Thou stance just because you don’t like it. I love dill pickles, but I hate sweet pickles. Am I going to stone your ass because you don’t eat dill pickles – noooo, am I going to give you a weird look and stare at you while you eat them – yes I do it much to the chagrin of my friends every time they eat them on their sandwiches. But I’m not going to JUDGE you for eating them.
Eight words the Witches Rede fulfill, An it harm none do what ye will. I’d say that’s a damn valid point myself.
PLS Shere your opinions......"
First, let me say that the use of the word “drug” is wrong in this instance. Simply put crack is not the same as peyote. Never has been, never will be. To group them together is wrong and it implies that certain substances are bad by association. We would never tell someone in severe pain that they can’t have morphine simply because there are people out there without enough willpower to not use or get off of the medication and subsequently abuse it. So to group them together is just, to me, poorly informed or ill-educated.
There are some substances that can be used in ritual, and I choose to separate these substances under the title of Psycho-Active Substances. To me this implies that it is more for medicinal – and by this I mean medicine for the spirit – use. Psycho like psyche the “above mind” and active, just that. A stimulation of the higher self if you will.
I think that if you are comfortable using them (PAS) then by all means feel free. However, as the title implies I do not think that you should be slathering it on, or drinking it down every time you have circle. Also I think that there should be age limits, much like the one America uses for tobacco and alcohol. Again, willpower and intelligence are needed, and from what I have seen are used in regards to these substances.
Secondly, there is recorded evidence of real witches using PAS since the middle ages. The first known case we have of this comes from approximately 1450 in the form of Flying Ointment to be used in pagan rituals, specifically those of witches, and was made up of solanaceous herbs. In fact one such recipe indicates that you would use Henbane, Wolfsbane, Belladonna and Hemlock in a mixture boiled in animal fat – usually toads known for their hallucinogenic toxic production.
So to state that “Real Witches” would/have never used PAS shows a poor witch, or one who is just too lazy to actually do some research into their (and by this I mean witches as a whole) past. And yes, I do feel that if you state you are a witch, you are obligated to go out and look at your own history – that however is a personal stance, but so far it has helped me pick out the real from the fad.
Now on the point of sex in ritual, I do not understand how or why one who calls themselves a witch would be against it. As anyone I have ever known who has participated in a Beltane ritual has performed accordingly; whether as a solitary, or within a coven. This is one of the reasons most Beltane circles are closed to members who aren’t part of the coven and the vast majority separate the daytime celebrations from the evening, especially festivals occurring around this time – at least the ones I’ve been to and have heard of friends participating in.
So the fact that sex in ritual would now be something to worry about baffles me. This said I would have to go with my previous statement of “intelligence and willpower.” As for the age limit on sex – it’s a no brainer.
As for the issue of liking/agreeing with Drawing Down the Moon by Margot Adler, I’d have to say that I really did enjoy this book. For me it was a way of looking into the past and seeing the struggle for Paganism to be recognized in its many facets (Druid, Wiccan, Hindu, etc etc) as a valid religious/spiritual choice. You also have to remember that you DON’T have to agree with what was said or done. Whether you live in American land of the free, or any other democratic society, or even any modern society you have a right to believe as you see fit so long as it doesn’t hurt someone else. This means everyone has the RIGHT to their own opinion.
That is what is so great about our time NOW. What Adler, Budapest, Starhawk, Crowley, Gardner, Buckland, Valiente worked their asses off for – our right to pick and choose what we want to learn. This is WHY we have so many different authors out there. I don’t know about you, but every book I have in my collection tells you point blank: “I am not saying that you HAVE to do it like this, choose what WORKS FOR YOU.” For instance, my friend loves Silver Ravenwolf – to me she is a preachy mom and gets on my nerves. Do I like everything she says? Hell No! Some of her points are valid; some of them are batshit crazy to me. I still read all her books though, regardless of how I feel about what she has to say on certain issues.
And personally – I don’t really like the tone of “if you use drugs or have sex you’re a bad person because my mommy told me so.” I think that attitude is part of the PROBLEM we have today. I think that if you are not comfortable doing it – you should not do it, but if you are myself and no one else has the right to tell you “you are wrong” just because we don’t agree. In my opinion that is a very Christian (Christian not the same as Christ Follower) attitude, and I just don’t like it.
If you don’t agree, disagree, but do not lord your opinion all over everywhere with a Holier-Than-Thou stance just because you don’t like it. I love dill pickles, but I hate sweet pickles. Am I going to stone your ass because you don’t eat dill pickles – noooo, am I going to give you a weird look and stare at you while you eat them – yes I do it much to the chagrin of my friends every time they eat them on their sandwiches. But I’m not going to JUDGE you for eating them.
Eight words the Witches Rede fulfill, An it harm none do what ye will. I’d say that’s a damn valid point myself.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Goodbye 25, And Good Riddance!
I have to say that 25 may be a milestone, but in this case it was a rather shitty one. Twenty-five has been full of disappointments, letdowns, and betrayals. As I say goodbye to 25, I say Good Riddance! You have been one of the worst years in my life. Congratulations for sucking so hardcore.
As we leave 25, let’s think of some tragic mini-milestones:
»We said good-bye to one of the best managers I’ve had the privilege of working under in a long time.
»We lost friends we thought were going to be there 5, 10, or 15+ years from now – turns out sometimes people are just not who you think they are.
We’ve learned:
»That even if it’s not your fault, someone out there is more than happy to blame you for it regardless.
»Sometimes public knowledge is a secret – go figure!
»You will miss those people who turned out not to be friends, and you’re just going to have to grin and bear it, because it never pays to try and keep in contact with them.
»That sometimes falling in love means nothing at all.
»What it means to be an American, and all the things we’re willing to fight for and against.
»Blood is not always thicker than water.
»If violence against another is violence against the self, you might as well hit the other person, because self-mutilation causes more concern.
»Religion is ridiculous regardless of the institution.
For all the hell that 25 gave us, it did at least try to redeem itself. We found old friends we thought were long lost, who had in fact been searching for us for quite a time. And we discovered what to do with our career and where the future will take us.
So goodbye 25, I’m not sorry to see you go. Good luck to everyone that is or will be 25 soon – you’re gonna need it.
As we leave 25, let’s think of some tragic mini-milestones:
»We said good-bye to one of the best managers I’ve had the privilege of working under in a long time.
»We lost friends we thought were going to be there 5, 10, or 15+ years from now – turns out sometimes people are just not who you think they are.
We’ve learned:
»That even if it’s not your fault, someone out there is more than happy to blame you for it regardless.
»Sometimes public knowledge is a secret – go figure!
»You will miss those people who turned out not to be friends, and you’re just going to have to grin and bear it, because it never pays to try and keep in contact with them.
»That sometimes falling in love means nothing at all.
»What it means to be an American, and all the things we’re willing to fight for and against.
»Blood is not always thicker than water.
»If violence against another is violence against the self, you might as well hit the other person, because self-mutilation causes more concern.
»Religion is ridiculous regardless of the institution.
For all the hell that 25 gave us, it did at least try to redeem itself. We found old friends we thought were long lost, who had in fact been searching for us for quite a time. And we discovered what to do with our career and where the future will take us.
So goodbye 25, I’m not sorry to see you go. Good luck to everyone that is or will be 25 soon – you’re gonna need it.
Twilight Invented Good Vampires?
I was looking through the local newspaper the other day, and I ran across this article, that quite literally made me want to vomit. It was such utter refuse I wanted to find the author and beat them to death with several hundred copies of the article. “The de-evilution of the vampire” indicated that Stephanie Meyer is the creator of heuristic philanthropic vampires who can be good beings and maybe hate who they are.
To the author of that article:
Oh hell no, you didn’t. Obviously, you haven’t read a book published before 2003. If you had, maybe you would know any of DOZENS of stories. For instance, the tale of Bunnicula – which I read in the THIRD GRADE, likely long before you could spell your own name let alone read it. This story is a lovable book about a VEGETARIAN vampire RABBIT. That’s right, a cute cuddly friendly little bunny THAT NEVER EVER BIT A HUMAN BEING – Suck on that Bella. The only people that have any right to be even slightly worried about Bunnicula are vegetable gardeners; and even then, what will you lose, one or two carrots a night? Oh the horror!
And why didn’t your mother love you – because if she had you would have grown up on Sesame Street with THE COUNT!! Who what, ran around counting and laughing. Oh, gee, what a horrible guy. And if you did find the time to crawl out from under your fucking rock and watch it – was he seriously that terrifying? Oh my god, he’s counting!! With *gasp* NUMBERS!! Noooooo! Get the fuck out of here.
As for vampires who “hate who they are” or “want to change” I have quite literally read dozens of books. If you look to ONE AUTHOR by the name of Anne Rice you will find her series FULL of vampires who at one time or another HATE THAT THEY ARE “DAMNED”. I swear to god every book in that series included one vampire or another who was pissing and moaning about having “no soul”. Even R.L. Stine had a vampire who hated being one.
And where the hell were you when Blade came out? I’m referring to the movies since it’s very doubtful you’re even aware they were ever graphic novels in the first place. Isn’t that entire series about a vampire who hates himself? ZOMFG, I’M TOTALLY RIGHT! *GASP* No Way! Not only that but several characters are self-loathers: Whistler, Hannibal Kane, even Dracula.
This only reminds one of Buffy the Vampire Slayer: the movie, the series, the graphic novels. It’s got its own franchise and a god damned spin off ALL ABOUT A SELF LOATHING FRACKIN’ VAMPIRE Angel. Hello! And there was also Spike. Both of them with more depth in their left ass cheek than Edward’s whole frickin’ family.
What’s infinitely worse is that the Twilight series is nothing but a rip-off of L.J. Smiths The Vampire Diaries. And a HORRIBLE one at that. First, no character has real depth and the only soul searching moments revolve around TEENAGE ANGST. Isn’t this why everyone is so glad they get out of high school and into the real world? The ability to look back and see that it was all MUNDANE BULLSHIT? That all the drama you were swept up in or watched was as fucking ridiculous as you thought it was or were told by your elders it was?
Second, all the violence is toned down or completely elimnated. What is this – preschool? I don’t know about you but most teenagers I know are aware that people die and that violence except in self-defense is bad. And do you honestly expect anyone to believe that all issues can be talked out? Yeah sure, tell that to everyone right after they just got assaulted. Go ahead, you tell them to talk it out with that douche bag that just robbed them. No. If you are going to lead someone up to an awesome battle, the point then is not to kill the climax by having them all talk it out. That’s just shitty writing, and a super doucher move.
Third, good authors do not preach anything, let alone abstinence. If you read any kind of scientific study you would know that preaching abstinence is WORSE than teaching sex education. Don’t believe me? READ A STUDY BY THE GOVERNMENT. Every study done by the government, and every other legitimate agency, has PROVEN that it is better to explain everything it correct terms and provide as much information as possible than to tell horror stories and lies. Not just evil boys want to have sex and not just whore girls either.
And since when do vampires automatically have no souls? I have read quite a few stories where the creatures of the night in question are as human in that respect as you or I. Besides the fact, that when was it proven that souls actually existed. This is not to state for or against, but how can you argue such a REGLIGIOUS point. Granted, it may be something the author believes in and thusly it is inserted almost unconsciously as though it would be absurd for the author not to have them. But then, how can you discount such a being simply because it’s different from you.
What then? Do pets not have souls, I mean they’re animals. They eat dead things and poop. Those are some pretty strange things. So then do they not have souls? What about owls, they live only by night, move silently and can turn their heads almost 180° – so then do they not have souls? Which then, I would argue that’s sort of egotistical, very Christian in that “conquer the world because it’s mine all mine”, but egotistical nonetheless.
Lastly, since freakin’ when did Edward and Bella make the best vampire love story? NO. I’m sorry, but it just isn’t happening. It can’t even compete with the lamest vampire-human love stories I’ve read or watched.
Take for instance Francis Ford Coppola’s 1992 Bram Stoker’s Dracula. Now everyone with two brain cells in their head that rub together will tell you the book is a far cry from the movie, so we’ll look at the movie for just its own sake. It tells the story of a guy who goes against his RELIGION AND COUNTRY for the girl he loves. Then he hangs around for centuries looking for her and finally DIES TO SAVE HER IMMORTAL SOUL. Hello Edward, you have accepted the short end of the stick, now please go take it to Buffy that she may properly end you.
And on another note, in the real world: EDWARD IS FUCKING GAY. He likes the sausage. No vajj for Mister Cullen, he prefers to stick with wood. If he really did exist, a character with his composition would be flat out fucking homosexual. He’d probably be a flamer, to be sure. Face it ladies, in real life Edward Cullen would be FAAAAAAAAAABULOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUS!!d
I am more than sure there are hundreds of books and stories and poems about good vampires that I’m missing. Why don’t you pull your head out of your ass and try and find some of them? Maybe my readers will be their super awesome selves and provide some examples.
And I know this was a tirade, but I am sick and fucking tired of all these whiny yappy bitches who don’t even read a single book a year all hopped up on this series who can’t even be bothered to read anything else with a monster in it.
To the author of that article:
Oh hell no, you didn’t. Obviously, you haven’t read a book published before 2003. If you had, maybe you would know any of DOZENS of stories. For instance, the tale of Bunnicula – which I read in the THIRD GRADE, likely long before you could spell your own name let alone read it. This story is a lovable book about a VEGETARIAN vampire RABBIT. That’s right, a cute cuddly friendly little bunny THAT NEVER EVER BIT A HUMAN BEING – Suck on that Bella. The only people that have any right to be even slightly worried about Bunnicula are vegetable gardeners; and even then, what will you lose, one or two carrots a night? Oh the horror!
And why didn’t your mother love you – because if she had you would have grown up on Sesame Street with THE COUNT!! Who what, ran around counting and laughing. Oh, gee, what a horrible guy. And if you did find the time to crawl out from under your fucking rock and watch it – was he seriously that terrifying? Oh my god, he’s counting!! With *gasp* NUMBERS!! Noooooo! Get the fuck out of here.
As for vampires who “hate who they are” or “want to change” I have quite literally read dozens of books. If you look to ONE AUTHOR by the name of Anne Rice you will find her series FULL of vampires who at one time or another HATE THAT THEY ARE “DAMNED”. I swear to god every book in that series included one vampire or another who was pissing and moaning about having “no soul”. Even R.L. Stine had a vampire who hated being one.
And where the hell were you when Blade came out? I’m referring to the movies since it’s very doubtful you’re even aware they were ever graphic novels in the first place. Isn’t that entire series about a vampire who hates himself? ZOMFG, I’M TOTALLY RIGHT! *GASP* No Way! Not only that but several characters are self-loathers: Whistler, Hannibal Kane, even Dracula.
This only reminds one of Buffy the Vampire Slayer: the movie, the series, the graphic novels. It’s got its own franchise and a god damned spin off ALL ABOUT A SELF LOATHING FRACKIN’ VAMPIRE Angel. Hello! And there was also Spike. Both of them with more depth in their left ass cheek than Edward’s whole frickin’ family.
What’s infinitely worse is that the Twilight series is nothing but a rip-off of L.J. Smiths The Vampire Diaries. And a HORRIBLE one at that. First, no character has real depth and the only soul searching moments revolve around TEENAGE ANGST. Isn’t this why everyone is so glad they get out of high school and into the real world? The ability to look back and see that it was all MUNDANE BULLSHIT? That all the drama you were swept up in or watched was as fucking ridiculous as you thought it was or were told by your elders it was?
Second, all the violence is toned down or completely elimnated. What is this – preschool? I don’t know about you but most teenagers I know are aware that people die and that violence except in self-defense is bad. And do you honestly expect anyone to believe that all issues can be talked out? Yeah sure, tell that to everyone right after they just got assaulted. Go ahead, you tell them to talk it out with that douche bag that just robbed them. No. If you are going to lead someone up to an awesome battle, the point then is not to kill the climax by having them all talk it out. That’s just shitty writing, and a super doucher move.
Third, good authors do not preach anything, let alone abstinence. If you read any kind of scientific study you would know that preaching abstinence is WORSE than teaching sex education. Don’t believe me? READ A STUDY BY THE GOVERNMENT. Every study done by the government, and every other legitimate agency, has PROVEN that it is better to explain everything it correct terms and provide as much information as possible than to tell horror stories and lies. Not just evil boys want to have sex and not just whore girls either.
And since when do vampires automatically have no souls? I have read quite a few stories where the creatures of the night in question are as human in that respect as you or I. Besides the fact, that when was it proven that souls actually existed. This is not to state for or against, but how can you argue such a REGLIGIOUS point. Granted, it may be something the author believes in and thusly it is inserted almost unconsciously as though it would be absurd for the author not to have them. But then, how can you discount such a being simply because it’s different from you.
What then? Do pets not have souls, I mean they’re animals. They eat dead things and poop. Those are some pretty strange things. So then do they not have souls? What about owls, they live only by night, move silently and can turn their heads almost 180° – so then do they not have souls? Which then, I would argue that’s sort of egotistical, very Christian in that “conquer the world because it’s mine all mine”, but egotistical nonetheless.
Lastly, since freakin’ when did Edward and Bella make the best vampire love story? NO. I’m sorry, but it just isn’t happening. It can’t even compete with the lamest vampire-human love stories I’ve read or watched.
Take for instance Francis Ford Coppola’s 1992 Bram Stoker’s Dracula. Now everyone with two brain cells in their head that rub together will tell you the book is a far cry from the movie, so we’ll look at the movie for just its own sake. It tells the story of a guy who goes against his RELIGION AND COUNTRY for the girl he loves. Then he hangs around for centuries looking for her and finally DIES TO SAVE HER IMMORTAL SOUL. Hello Edward, you have accepted the short end of the stick, now please go take it to Buffy that she may properly end you.
And on another note, in the real world: EDWARD IS FUCKING GAY. He likes the sausage. No vajj for Mister Cullen, he prefers to stick with wood. If he really did exist, a character with his composition would be flat out fucking homosexual. He’d probably be a flamer, to be sure. Face it ladies, in real life Edward Cullen would be FAAAAAAAAAABULOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUS!!d
I am more than sure there are hundreds of books and stories and poems about good vampires that I’m missing. Why don’t you pull your head out of your ass and try and find some of them? Maybe my readers will be their super awesome selves and provide some examples.
And I know this was a tirade, but I am sick and fucking tired of all these whiny yappy bitches who don’t even read a single book a year all hopped up on this series who can’t even be bothered to read anything else with a monster in it.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Attack of the Cat: E2
Lately I’ve been noticing a lot of things out of the corner of my eye. Now I say things because a lot of it I’m not catching, and what I do catch just isn’t there upon closer inspection. Like spiders, lots of spiders. And I’m sure you’re thinking, well maybe you really did see a spider you daffy bitch. But no, I really did not. If I really am seeing these spiders, then we’re all fucked. Because the smallest one I’ve seen lately was the size of a baseball and the biggest one the size of a golden retriever. And always out the corner of my eye. That and people. Lots of people. And lots of random whosiwhatsits that I just have no idea on. So that’s fun.
Other than that, I’m moving. Yet again. In the past two years I’ve moved five times. Which might not seem like a lot, but when you do the math it does turn out to be quite exhausting. And if we factor in the past five years total, then that’s an average of three times a year. Seriously! Who needs to move this much?!? Fuck me I’m tired! Although this has led me to some conclusions. My next apartment will be by myself. No roommates. At all. For at least one year. Fuck the haters, the gossips and the frienemies, I’m done with all your mundane bullshit. So I will spend a goodly amount of time all by my onesies. Cleanse my aura and get back to my roots and all that jazz.
Also I’m seriously considering life abroad. I’m thinking France, specifically Paris. I think every artist should live in Paris for a while, or hell, maybe just everyone. I think it’s good for you. Maybe some other places too. Just immerse yourself in foreign culture and drown for a bit. Plus the cost of living is pretty comparable to where I’m at now, so couldn’t be that hard. And all I’d have to do to prepare is brush up on my French a bit, which will take all of a month. So no worries there. Now just to explore the local culture and nab my passport. Just in case all lights are go.
I am so tired of moving. Seriously…
Other than that, I’m moving. Yet again. In the past two years I’ve moved five times. Which might not seem like a lot, but when you do the math it does turn out to be quite exhausting. And if we factor in the past five years total, then that’s an average of three times a year. Seriously! Who needs to move this much?!? Fuck me I’m tired! Although this has led me to some conclusions. My next apartment will be by myself. No roommates. At all. For at least one year. Fuck the haters, the gossips and the frienemies, I’m done with all your mundane bullshit. So I will spend a goodly amount of time all by my onesies. Cleanse my aura and get back to my roots and all that jazz.
Also I’m seriously considering life abroad. I’m thinking France, specifically Paris. I think every artist should live in Paris for a while, or hell, maybe just everyone. I think it’s good for you. Maybe some other places too. Just immerse yourself in foreign culture and drown for a bit. Plus the cost of living is pretty comparable to where I’m at now, so couldn’t be that hard. And all I’d have to do to prepare is brush up on my French a bit, which will take all of a month. So no worries there. Now just to explore the local culture and nab my passport. Just in case all lights are go.
I am so tired of moving. Seriously…
Friday, October 23, 2009
My Muse, My Friend
You know, I just don’t understand you. And I wish that I did, or at least knew more about you to make the confusion a bearable placating thing. I’d like to be a friend. But somehow I think I have fucked things up along the way, and while I have vastly tried to fix things, I often feel I’m making more of a mess. I might convey this sentiment to you, if it didn’t feel like every effort is an unwarranted intrusion into your life.
I want to be a part of your life, but I think you may have misconstrued the implications of my desire for you. To be sure I have no ill intentions or misguided delusions of intimacy and that is not exactly what I strive to clamor for. That’s not what this raucous is about. I have never thought that asking to be someone’s friend would be so complicated and tedious a task, but you seem to effortlessly excel at it.
Perhaps it is arrogance, but I cannot bring myself to try and correct you. I think it’s more like to be fear. And maybe I do want more out of you than friendship, but it’s something I’ve already taken. Whether you want to be or not, I’ve made you a muse. Or maybe Fate has, she tends to be a mucker. My many misadventures have seemingly led to you, and so I will take this if this is all I have to gain from you. And let me assure you, it is not enough.
I want to be close. I want to be friends. I want to be the kind of people who call each other in the middle of the morning/night/etc because it is all suddenly so overwhelming and the sheer magnitude of it is crushing down and you can rant and rave endless and know the other person is listening and even if they haven’t had that exact feeling they know where you are coming from and have some thoughts to express and some suggestions to make. And even if all the advice fails, you know it is all going to be fine because you both can share in that moment and be free to be afraid together, knowing in the end the storm will pass and it will be good again tomorrow.
I am not searching for a savior, saint or prophet. Nor would I expect you to fulfill those roles. I am merely asking for a companion on this long lost road, on this distant journey to many misadventures. And sadly I’m finding the place I believe you should belong, despairingly vacant.
I want to be a part of your life, but I think you may have misconstrued the implications of my desire for you. To be sure I have no ill intentions or misguided delusions of intimacy and that is not exactly what I strive to clamor for. That’s not what this raucous is about. I have never thought that asking to be someone’s friend would be so complicated and tedious a task, but you seem to effortlessly excel at it.
Perhaps it is arrogance, but I cannot bring myself to try and correct you. I think it’s more like to be fear. And maybe I do want more out of you than friendship, but it’s something I’ve already taken. Whether you want to be or not, I’ve made you a muse. Or maybe Fate has, she tends to be a mucker. My many misadventures have seemingly led to you, and so I will take this if this is all I have to gain from you. And let me assure you, it is not enough.
I want to be close. I want to be friends. I want to be the kind of people who call each other in the middle of the morning/night/etc because it is all suddenly so overwhelming and the sheer magnitude of it is crushing down and you can rant and rave endless and know the other person is listening and even if they haven’t had that exact feeling they know where you are coming from and have some thoughts to express and some suggestions to make. And even if all the advice fails, you know it is all going to be fine because you both can share in that moment and be free to be afraid together, knowing in the end the storm will pass and it will be good again tomorrow.
I am not searching for a savior, saint or prophet. Nor would I expect you to fulfill those roles. I am merely asking for a companion on this long lost road, on this distant journey to many misadventures. And sadly I’m finding the place I believe you should belong, despairingly vacant.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Time Wounds All Heals
There are those moments that are so overwhelming they cannot help themselves but to induce a deep state of mourning. Often it is nothing so tragic an event to warrant it, but a simple phrase or gesture, so seemingly benign as to completely and utterly discombobulate. Often I find myself without the wherewithal to go about business as usual. And so I retract and make myself small, an easily overlooked nuance.
This is not to say I go off into some deep dark cave and commence to wail about all the things I’ve lost, rather to the contrary. I find myself in these instances more often than not going about business as usual. A state which is not indicative I care less, just that I retract mentally and continue about my daily routines in a manner which lends to benevolence and commonality so as not to draw suspicions. I find it easier to process in a style that most would find, and have on the occasion I allow the observation, to find it jerky and to frighteningly out of sorts. I can move through the five stages of grief in as little as a day.
I am tragically adept at something no one should become so skilled at.
It is something I have come to deal with. Having skill sets no one wants. The irony in this is a priceless gem. Because the skills no one wants are almost always the ones they need – or will at some point, and so my advice is a hot commodity. I have the ability to see both sides of the issue clearly and argue the points for and against it. This lends logic to passion and passion to logic. Thus creating a conundrum of profound proportions.
And so I sit here, staring at this statement. A simple phrase which has no bearing upon my life or the rules and morals by which I gauge my everyday self –and yet the impact is severe. I am so unsure of what to do when I read this, the simple insecurity is a catastrophe in and of itself, and in the end the most I can do is hold steady and find myself amused. A heartrending find which no action I may take will undo or remedy and the best thing to do is merely ride it out. Breakwater.
I would like to tell the person that they are wrong or that they do not know of which they speak. However, I have no grounds to stand upon and thus no judgment to lend. So I find myself without a voice or a port in the storm. Time wounds all heals and if I wait just a bit longer the hemorrhage will ebb and dawdle or cease. And I have come to find I no longer mind the bleeding.
This is not to say I go off into some deep dark cave and commence to wail about all the things I’ve lost, rather to the contrary. I find myself in these instances more often than not going about business as usual. A state which is not indicative I care less, just that I retract mentally and continue about my daily routines in a manner which lends to benevolence and commonality so as not to draw suspicions. I find it easier to process in a style that most would find, and have on the occasion I allow the observation, to find it jerky and to frighteningly out of sorts. I can move through the five stages of grief in as little as a day.
I am tragically adept at something no one should become so skilled at.
It is something I have come to deal with. Having skill sets no one wants. The irony in this is a priceless gem. Because the skills no one wants are almost always the ones they need – or will at some point, and so my advice is a hot commodity. I have the ability to see both sides of the issue clearly and argue the points for and against it. This lends logic to passion and passion to logic. Thus creating a conundrum of profound proportions.
And so I sit here, staring at this statement. A simple phrase which has no bearing upon my life or the rules and morals by which I gauge my everyday self –and yet the impact is severe. I am so unsure of what to do when I read this, the simple insecurity is a catastrophe in and of itself, and in the end the most I can do is hold steady and find myself amused. A heartrending find which no action I may take will undo or remedy and the best thing to do is merely ride it out. Breakwater.
I would like to tell the person that they are wrong or that they do not know of which they speak. However, I have no grounds to stand upon and thus no judgment to lend. So I find myself without a voice or a port in the storm. Time wounds all heals and if I wait just a bit longer the hemorrhage will ebb and dawdle or cease. And I have come to find I no longer mind the bleeding.
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